Previews

You Share The Same Fate As The People You Hate – ’18-’19 Team Previews: Unpainted Huffhines

Sam Fels September 21, 2018 0

Oh right, the Arizona Coyotes. That’s how I feel every time I hear their name. Like that cousin you’ve met once. You never think about them, and quite often you forget they exist. And then you’re reminded that yes, they are in some small way part of your life and there are

Musings

Well Pilgrim, Not Until You Eat The Peanuts Outta My… – FFUD’s ’17-’18 Player Reviews – Connor Murphy Or: How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love Our Large Irish Son

John Pullega April 20, 2018 0

When the Hawks brought Connor Murphy in, he was the presumptive favorite to replace the puck-pocked husk of what was once Niklas Hjalmarsson. And as the season went on, and the Hawks found their heads deeper and deeper in the toilet, the narrative began to range from “the Hawks will need a Top 4 defenseman […]

Previews

Game #56 – Hawks vs. Coyotes Spotlight: Another Wunderkind

Sam Fels February 12, 2018 0

If you’re one of those freaks like us that hopes one day hockey management might be moved out of the caves and stop being afraid of the sun, there’s a part of you that wants the John Chayka’s of the world to succeed. Someone is going to have to be first through the wall. It’s […]

Previews

Game #56 – Hawks vs. Coyotes Douchebag Du Jour: The Memory Of Hammer

Sam Fels February 12, 2018 0

Oh calm down. We’d never turn against our favorite Tre Kronor regular. Niklas Hjalmarsson was a great Hawk, a major part of three Cups, and certainly should be remembered well in these parts. But it’s that last component that’s getting really annoying. Especially considering some of the other complains about this current Hawks team. You […]

Wraps

Game #48 – We Need New Pornos. Guess I’m Still Writing – Hawks 2, Leafs 2 (Leafs Win Sap Boil)

John Pullega January 24, 2018 0

Box Score Hockey Stats Natural Stat Trick Do you remember wanting to do a fatality in Mortal Kombat II on Sega Genesis, but the combo was 15 buttons long and you were fucking 10 so you couldn’t finish it on time? That’s what this game was. To the bullets. – Brent Seabrook had an eventful […]

Musings

The Secrecy To Nowhere Leads To Me, Q, Kid Rock, Why Hockey Is The Circus Clown Of Sports

Sam Fels January 19, 2018 0

Took a few days off myself during the bye and let the proletariat handle it. So clearly there’s some stuff to get through since if you give the Hawks enough time without any games they probably will trip over their own dicks. -I can’t add too much to what Pullega and Rose have put up over […]

Previews

Your Friends And Neighbors – ’17-’18 NHL Team Previews: Would You Buy Furniture From Unpainted Huffhines?

September 22, 2017

As the latest team to be run by a analytic wunderkind, every hockey fan who’d like to see the game move forward in any way, there is some investment in the success of the Arizona Coyotes. With some smart summer moves (not necessarily Hjalmarsson), the Yotes are going to be some people’s pick to surprise. […]

Musings

Tardy Ruthlessness

July 6, 2017

The NHL offseason has basically become pretty much every fan laughing at the stupid decisions of GMs across the league, and fans of those teams those GMs preside over trying to sell themselves on others that they weren’t THAT stupid. Some of that has reached these pastures, and maybe some of it is deserved. It […]

Everything Else

Just Another Friday Morning

June 23, 2017

Full disclosure, I’m writing this wearing my Brandon Saad Saginaw Spirit jersey, so that’s where I am emotionally. Ok… let’s see if we can parse this altogether. It’s not going to be easy. So here’s the facts. The Hawks first traded Niklas Hjalmarsson to Arizona for Connor Murphy and Laurent Dauphin. Then, presumably getting buzzed […]

Previews

Yeah, She’s Doing The Lindy Hop: Stars at Hawks Preview/Vinyl Swap

March 23, 2017

 vs.  RECORDS: Stars 29-33-10   Hawks 47-20-6 PUCK DROP: 7:30pm TV: CSN YU DARVISH FAN CLUB: Defending Big D PROJECTED LINEUPS TEAM ADJUSTED CORSI%: Stars – 49.3 (2oth)  Hawks – 50.8 (11th) TEAM ADJUSTED xGF%: Stars – 48.3 (20th)  Hawks – 49.2 (18th) POWER PLAY: Stars – 18.1 (19th)  Hawks – 19.1 (15th) PENALTY KILL: […]